Friday, January 11, 2008

The Last Day of the Soon-To-Be-Previous Phase of My Life

One of my writers said this week that the old platitude "today is the first day of the rest of your life" was kind of stupid, because it was always true. Of course, in a way that's the point, but it undermines the concept a bit, too. After all, even if you're sitting around eating potato chips and watching reruns, it's the first day of the rest of your life. Sick in bed and unable to do anything? First day of the rest of your life. You get the point.

Tomorrow, I guess, will be the first day of my new phase of life. Today was the last day of the old one. The day when it becomes not-exactly-accurate to use the phrase "one of my writers" in the first paragraph of this post.

For the past two years I've worked in a place that some of my friends have referred to as "the Gulch" after Galt's Gulch. The kind of place that you probably think only exists on television: imagine one huge, open room full of energetic, creative, talented (and mostly gorgeous) young men and women. Add an interesting mission and a healthy dose of ethics and humanity coming from the top, bottomless coffee, the occasional bout of loud music, a dog wandering through from time to time and an invading army of tiny glow-in-the-dark zombies and you either have a very successful sitcom or a utopian work environment.

Unless this is a Truman Show kind of thing and I'm the last to know, my office was the latter.
Sadly, it was inconveniently located. By "inconveniently located" I don't mean that it was in a bad place. On the contrary (of course) it was in a section of the loop surrounded by activity, dining opportunities, parks, convenient banking and a large number of jewelers. It just wasn't anywhere near my kid. If you're a regular reader here, you may have gathered that I'm pretty attached to my kid.

Still, parenting is a balancing act, especially when you're doing it alone. I wanted to see more of my daughter, but (as she told me once when she was four or five) "you have to feed your kid every day. It's a law." So we got by. The days were long for both of us and I ended up in the hospital a time or two, but if you have to work for a living it might as well be in The Perfect Job, right?

And then, out of the blue, another perfect job appeared. (Yes, I'm well aware that my good fortune is far beyond what I could possibly deserve.) Like my current (past) job, this one made use of all of my varied past experiences: editorial, legal, educational. Like my current (past) job, this one involved working with quality people. Unlike my current (past) job, this one allowed me to work from home--and thereby solved every problem in my life.

That sounds absurd, I know, but every identifiable problem in my life related to the time I spent commuting. The days were too long for my daughter. I didn't get to spend enough time with her. She didn't get enough sleep. I didn't get enough sleep. We were both getting sick a lot. My house was getting out of control (okay, had been out of control for a long time). I hadn't seen my friends in months. I'd lived in the same place for a year and a half and not gotten around to hanging curtains.

So really, what choice did I have?

And yet, I don't want to sound like I'm taking a job I don't want just to cut out the commute. No, the new job is very exciting. Exciting enough that when my future (current) boss was describing it to me, I had to get up and pace around the room while I talked to him. I simply couldn't sit still for it. I'm very eager to get started.

So I left behind a cluster of talented young writers that had melded into a team of laughter and moral outrage and mission--that, I might dare to say, I had melded into that team. I left behind the close proximity of friends and the certainty that someone within ten feet would always share my outrage at the metamorphosis of language or the abuse of an apostrophe, traded it for dinner with my daughter and sleep and a brand new mission, for the possibility of vacations and the ability to help with homework and the chance that I might one day host dinners and volunteer again.

But I didn't quite believe it, even over a cake that said I was leaving (a cake dented, ever-so-slightly, on the trip across town, served in a kitchen stocked with everything up to and including a martini shaker, but nothing with which one could serve cake). I didn't believe it because the unity in the room made it seem absurd that separation was possible, let alone already in progress. I'm still waiting to see what it will look like Monday morning.

8 comments:

Unknown said...

wow Tiffany congrats. It's eerily similar to my situation only kind of in reverse...Starting a new job with an hour an 15 min commute one way...Strange!

T

Emily Suess said...

Congrats. I know what it's like to leave a fabulous job too. It's a little eerie. But best of luck with the new position. I'm sure you'll make the most of your "extra" time! :)

Stella said...

Congratulations :) I don't mean to sound corny, but I always admire people who are brave enough to start a different phase in their lives.

Naomi from IttyBiz said...

Not crazy at all. I've been at home for a long time, but my husband joined up officially a few months ago and I can't even describe the difference in our lives.

Good for you!

Anonymous said...

I'm doing the three hour train/bus thing and hating it.

Leaving a job when things are going well can be a good thing too.

Anyway, congratulations and good luck with your new venture, which sounds ever so mysterious.

Jack Payne said...

For 10 years I commuted from Racine, wisconsin to the Loop. Ate up 3 hours a day, twiddling away time, just in transit, on the old narrow-gage, North Shore RR. Must have been nuts.

Went from there to the other extreme--staying home and starting Business Opportunities Digest, in my basement, on a makeshift desk made of a house door for a desktop. Twelve years later I sold it and retired.

Takes guts to make a move like this, Tiffany. Sometimes it's a major "trigger point" in your life that pays off in major dividends.

Margo said...

You didn't mention that your old job adopted a goat!

Goat adoption impresses me.

--Margo S.

Anonymous said...

Congratulations... You've been very fortunate to be blessed with the two mentioned opportunites in your working life. By fortunate, I do not mean to imply it was luck. From poking around in your posts and archives...I believe, they are well deserved.

I'm going to come at this from a different angle than the other comments. In fact, it is the reason I am posting at all. You've had nearly two months to experience the extra time with your child. I'm sure you have already come to the realization of what I'm going to write. The time spent with our children is priceless. The cliche is...they grow up too fast... but as trite as it sounds, it is the truth.

The older our children get, the faster the time passes. Reading your posts, I know you have many many projects on your plate. One day in the not to distant future, you child will no doubt become immersed in something that monopolizes their time. That's when it gets terribly difficult for a single parent.

The opportunity to share your *busyness* without a long commute cutting into your time together will be treasured and take on so much meaning when you look back in a few years and your child is grown.

Blog Lady Dee
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