Do We Really Need to Go FASTER?

I started this as a writing blog, and I hope that it mostly remains one, but every once in a while I have a thought. Well, I have thoughts frequently, but every once in a while I have a thought I'd like to make in public, without having to write a query and seek an appropriate venue, and I think that's mostly what blogs are for.

So here's my thought today: On the way home on the train this evening, I saw a sign advertising Chase's new feature that allows one to set ATM preferences so that you can "get cash twice as fast".

How long does the typical ATM transaction take? I'll admit that I've never timed it (although you can be sure that I'm going to), but I'm guessing less than ninety seconds. So. Yeah. I REALLY need to shave that 45 seconds off my cash withdrawal time. It's going to change my whole day.

I know it sounds like I'm being sarcarstic, but in fact I think that it IS going to change my whole day--and yours too--and the change isn't for the better.

Remember when you had to go to the library and sort through drawers for the right roll of microfiche and pop it into a machine and turn and turn and turn and focus in order to find an old magazine or newspaper article? I'm talking 1988 here, not the forties.

Okay, quick show of hands: how many of you have complained out loud about how long it takes a newspaper article or other resource to load online? We cut out the travel time, we cut out the sorting through the cabinets, we cut out the scrolling, then we even cut out the dial-up delay, and now we're groaning, "this is so slooooowww" when it takes 30 or 45 seconds for a web page to display.

Now, I'm not a stop-and-smell-the-roses kind of girl by any stretch of the imagination, but I have to say that I think maybe driving to the library was much healthier for us, as individuals and as a culture. I say that in part because we interacted with live people more, and were less rushed when we did. I say it partly because downtime like that you spend driving alone gives you time and space to think. And I say it partly because I think there's something inherently unhealthy, mentally and physically, about feeling the need to shave that extra 45 seconds off our ATM transactions.

I don't mean to lay this all at Chase's doorstep, though I do think Chase is the root of all evil (we'll talk about that another day). I see it at the gas station where "Speedpass" promises to save me the time it takes to actually INSERT MY CREDIT CARD, since I just have to wave it at the machine. I see it at the grocery store where "one touch" payment is so "convenient" that we've all conveniently overlooked how creepy and 1984 it is. Saddest of all, I see it in the parents who can't let their children tie their own shoes or zip their own jackets because that extra minute or two seems so critical to whatever it is they're rushing off to.

So here's my plan. I'm not signing up for one touch payment. I'm going to write checks just like we did back in prehistoric times, and if that takes an extra 30 seconds I'm going to use that time to wish the clerk a nice evening and smile at the person behind me (whose brain will probably be exploding because I'm writing a check). I'm going to leave my ATM preferences unset and go ahead and take that full 90 seconds to withdraw cash from the machine. I'm never, never, never going to say "let me do that for you" to my daughter just to speed her up. And I could be wrong, but I suspect that all those "wasted" seconds are going to add up and reappear at the end of my life, when I live a lot longer without the pressure of having to complete all of my transactions in under a minute.